Preparing for a new experience

We all know the drill. You prepare for uncharted territory in life by reading, watching or listening to anything and everything you can about said anticipated new experience. Perhaps there’s some physical training or movement involved to get ready. These are all important steps. Those books, podcasts, and YouTube videos are all great. There’s no doubt they can help. Our google search history can reveal quite a bit about our state of mind and also questions we might have, heading into something new.

But can you truly prepare and be one hundred percent ready for a new experience? I don’t think you can know how you’ll live it until you’re IN IT. Ahh, the irony!

In thinking about my work as a postpartum doula, I find myself considering this question of preparing. Yes, everyone reads the “What to Expect” books, or books of the pregnancy/childbirth genre. These books are indeed chock full of information; and even information that’s relevant to the postpartum period (though there is still a shockingly disproportionate amount of information and support specific to the postpartum…but I digress!). However, reading about it is quite different than living it. Questions or circumstances come up, and we think “hang on, this was NOT in that book I read! So, now what?”. Time to google, “green poop” or “projectile vomiting” or “purple umbilical cord”!

Part of life is stumbling through and navigating that which is new; this encourages growth and hopefully confidence moving forward.

Somehow the stakes feel higher when you’re now responsible for this new human and not just yourself. It can throw things a bit out of whack. This new experience of becoming a parent - about which you read all the blogs, all the articles, all the books - is ALL-encompassing. Even becoming a parent for a second or third time brings new elements to the table.

We prepare the best way we know how. But there is so much about becoming a new parent that remains unknown until you’re actually living it.